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Multiple personality“It is truly a challenge to live with someone who always says YES to challenges! I don’t think that you even can spell the word NO”. The other part of me goes on: “You are right, I like challenges. It keeps us healthy!” I have heard the accusing words echoing in my head the last couple of weeks, as I have tried to write the very first number of my Newsletter. I recognize this “inner dialogue” with myself so well. In other words, this type of conflict between what to plan, what to do and what to prioritize has been on the inner agenda earlier! I am not sure if this behavior started when I got Parkinson’s disease (PD), but I am convinced that it has increased a lot in the latest years. My feeling of multiple personality goes hand in hand with the typical PD levels of movement disorder often called OFF, ON and ON2 . In my book “I have Parkinson’s, but Parkinson’s does not have me” I show a model, a three storey house, as an attempt to explain what I mean with the different levels. When in the Cellar I compare that with “OFF”. There I am reluctant to give promises, take decisions, to change etc. I tend to be introvert and prefer to be by myself. In the middle I have the Dream Floor and that’s of course the same as ON. Here I am my normal self and I love to be here. When in the Attic Floor I am very active, open to changes, love challenges and news. I use to describe it as a state where Mr. Parkinson is inviting me to dance Jitterbug all the time!  Parkinson's can be compared to a three-story building, where each story represents different moods. Now for a while transform the three stages and the variation between them into the situation of the relative. How on earth shall that person be able to judge which floor the Parkinson diagnosed is at the moment. If the relative can’t judge this she can’t take the right actions as the need depends on the levels. And how shall the most honest Parkinson diagnosed person be trustworthy in the following situation. Imagine that she one moment is unable to do the dishes, because she is in the “Cellar”. A couple of minutes later though, when the job is done by the relative she is very capable to do anything in the kitchen! What I want to point at is of course the very tricky situations the movement disorder can an put us into. It demands a great deal of sensitivity and empathy as well good communication and trust on both sides. To be able to learn from the mistakes that you will make is also of course also an important skill to be able to reach continuous improvement in your quality of life. I recommend you to stop and reflect together with the relative you have, how you are doing in this matter. There are so many traps to fall into. And do the checking regularly and let both sides have their chance to present their questions, viewpoints and feelings. A year ago I was very surprised when I suddenly found out that I could do much more than I had been able to do the day before! What happened? Well I can tell you that it had nothing to do with me at all. It was entirely about my wife. She broke her right arm! I am a little ashamed to admit I had used quite a portion of the “sickness-benefits” before the accident. I also have to admit to you, that I went back to status quo as soon as my wife regained strength in her arm. We went back to roles we obviously wanted to have. |
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